Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Recently, I find my attention span shortening at an alarming rate (that is, if it's even in existence), and the ability to stay sober/awake seems to be diminishing. During lectures especially, I find my mind wandering elsewhere(mostly dreamland), mulling about everything else other than what I'm supposed to be otherwise engrossed in intelligent conversations with my classmates about.

I think I'm suffering from chronic sleep deficiency. Maybe because its the season of competition, the season of sportsmanship, the burning of passion, the hunger for gold, where competitors pitch themselves against each other in a bid for recognition, of glory in abundance on the podium. It's a physically and mentally draining process no doubt, but when you reach the end, everything will be worth it.

Anyways, back from digression to my problem.

I tried, I really did, to resist slumber and push out distracting thoughts which keep barging into my brain space. I really want to absorb everything the lecturer says like a sponge soaking moisture, but it didn't really help that the lecturer (specifically referring to the subject which deals with titrations) was talking in a monotone voice. It sounded as if every succession of words she uttered was in a single key, every word was as if chained to each other, creating a single musical note which seemed to stretch forever, if you get what I mean. It goes in one ear and then slips out the other.

Suddenly this weird image popped into my mind. Every word that the lecturer says is like a live fish in a basketful of fishes. You try to catch one, but when you thought you've had it tightly clenched in your hands it does a little wriggle and slithers away again.

Sometimes I think teachers/lecturers/tutors/ or whichever form they come in, are overtly self-satisfied beings (not all though). As if their knowledge in their respective domains gives them the right to put down everyone who "hath naught what thou possesses". Like, with their self-asserted power they assume everything they do is right, all others wrong. I find it a very annoying/disgusting/repulsive/add-in-any-irritative-words trait. It totally puts me off. Who gave you the right to decide which is the correct way to live my life. I'm gonna wipe that condescending look off your face with my A1 next next year. Just you wait.

Okay enough of angst, and back to my digression topic... I am looking forward to feeling the pump of adrenaline, the roar of the crowds, the flood of spotlights, the speed and intensity of quality play, honourable sportsmanship, and finally, heads held high in victory~!. :D

writing at 7:25 PM

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